LACHMAN'S ONE HUNDRED NOTABLE AMERICAN NOVELS OF DETECTION

Anthony Abbot	The Shudders
Earl Derr Biggers	Charlie Chan Carries On
Herbert Brean	Wilders Walk Away
Herbert Brean	Hardly a Man Is Stll Alive
Jon I. Breen	Triple Crown
Robert Campbell	The Junkyard Dog
John Dickson Carr	Hag's Nook 마녀의 은신처
John Dickson Carr	The Three Coffins 세 개의 관
Jojn Dickson Carr	The Crooked Hinge
John Dickson Carr	The Case of the Constant Suicides 연속 살인사건
John Dickson Carr	Patrick Butler for the Defense
John Dickson Carr	The Burning Court 화형 법정
Max Allan Collins	Kill Your Darlings
Amanda Cross	The James Joyce Murder
Amanda Cross	Death in a Tenured Position
Barbara D'Amato	The Hands of Healing Murder
Dorothy Salisbury Davis	A Gentle Murder
Carter Dickson	The Judas Window
Carter Dickson	The Reader Is Warned
Carter Dickson	The Gilded Man
Carter Dickson	She Died a Lady
Carter Dickson	He Wouldn't Kill Patience
Carter Dickson	Fear Is the Same
Doris Miles Disney	Method in Madness
Doris Miles Disney	Who Rides a Tiger
Aaron Elkins	Old Bones
Helen Eustis	The Horizontal Man
Erle Stanley Gardner	The Case of the Howling Dog
Erle Stanley Gardner	The Case of the Counterfeit Eye 의안 살인사건
Erle Stanley Gardner	The Case of the Lame Canary
Erle Stanley Gardner	The Case of the Perjured Parrot
Erle Stanley Gardner	The Case of the Crooked Candle
Erle Stanley Gardner	The Case of the Black-Eyed Blonde
Alan Green	What a Body!
Anna Katharine Green	The Leavenworth Case
Frances Noyes Hart	The Bellamy Trial
Matthew Head	The Devil in the Bush
Tony Hillerman	The Fly on the Wall
H. H. Holmes	Nine Times Nine
H. H. Holmes	Rocket to the Morgue
Jeffrey Hudson	A Case of Need 위급한 경우에는
Harry Kemelman	Friday the Rabbi Slept Late
Harry Kemelman	Saturday the Rabbi Went Hungry
C. Daly King	Obelists Fly High
Jane Langton	Emily Dickinson Is Dead
Emma Lathen	Banking on Death
Emma Lathen	Accounting for Murder
Emma Lathen	Murder Makes the Wheels Go Round
Emma Lathen	Murder Against the Grain
Emma Lathen	When in Greece
Frances & Richard Lockridge	The Norths Meet Murder
Frances & Richard Lockridge	Murder Out of Turn
Frances & Richard Lockridge	The Dishonest Murder
Helen McCloy	Through a Glass, Darkly 어두운 거울속에
Pat McGerr	Pick Your Victim
Charlotte MacLeod	Rest You Merry
Lynn Meyer	Paperback Thriller
Margaret Millar	The Iron Gates
Margaret Millar	Ask for Me Tomorrow
Margaret Millar	Vanish in an Instant
Margaret Millar	Beast in View
Richard A. Moore	Death in the Past
Haughton Murphy	Murder for Lunch
Francis M. Nevins, Jr.	The 120-Hour Clock
Katherine Hall Page	The Body in the Belfry
Stuart Palmer	The Puzzle of the Blue Banderilla
Hugh Pentecost	Remember to Kill Me
Nancy Pickard	Generous Death
Nancy Pickard	No Body
Marissa Piesman	Unorthodox Practices
Ellery Queen	The Roman Hat Mystery 로마모자의 비밀
Ellery Queen	The French Powder Mystery 프랑스 파우더의 비밀
Ellery Queen	The Greek Coffin Mystery 그리스 관의 비밀
Ellery Queen	The Egyptian Cross Mystery 이집트 십자가의 비밀
Ellery Queen	The Chinese Orange Mystery 차이나 오렌지의 비밀
Ellery Queen	Calamity Town 재앙의 거리
Ellery Queen	Cat of Many Tails 꼬리 아홉 고양이
Patrick Quentin	Puzzle for Puppets
Clayton Rawson	Death from a Top Hat
Herbert Resnicow	The Gold Gamble
Craig Rice	8 Faces at 3
Richard D. Rosen	Strike Three You're Dead 스트라이크 살인
Barnaby Ross	The Tragedy of X X의 비극
Barnaby Ross	The Tragedy of Y Y의 비극
Henry Slesar	The Gray Flannel Shroud 회색 플라넬 수의
Charles Merrill Smith	Reverand Randollph and the Wages of Sin
Jim Stinson	Double Exposure
David Stout	Carolina Skeletons
Rex Stout	Fer-de-Lance 독사
Rex Stout	The Rubber Band
Rex Stout	Too Many Cooks 요리장이 너무 많다
Rex Stout	Some Buried Caesar 챔피언 시저의 죽음
Rex Stout	The Silent Speaker
Rex Stout	In the Best Families
Rex Stout	The Black Mountain
Rex Stout	The Doorbell Rang
Rex Stout	A Family Affair
Hake Talbot	Rim of the Pit
Alice Tilton	The Cut Direct
S. S. Van Dine	The Greene Murder Case 그린 살인 사건

얼 스탠리 가드너 (Erle Stanley Gardner)

'Perry Mason' Novels
1) The Case of the Velvet Claws 비로도의 손톱	1933
2) The Case of the Sulky Girl 토라진 아가씨	1933
3) The Case of the Curious Bride 기묘한 신부	1934
4) The Case of the Howling Dog	1934
5) The Case of the Lucky Legs 행운의 다리 미녀	1934
6) The Case of the Caretaker's Cat 관리인의 고양이	1935
7) The Case of the Counterfeit Eye 의안 살인 사건	1935
8) The Case of the Sleepwalker's Niece	1936
9) The Case of the Stuttering Bishop 말더듬이 주교	1936
10) The Case of the Dangerous Dowager	1937
11) The Case of the Lame Canary	1937
12) The Case of the Shoplifter's Shoe	1938
13) The Case of the Substitute Face	1938
14) The Case of the Perjured Parrot	1939
15) The Case of the Rolling Bones	1939
16) The Case of the Baited Hook	1940
17) The Case of the Silent Partner	1940
18) The Case of the Empty Tin	1941
19) The Case of the Haunted Husband	1941
20) The Case of the Careless Kitten	1942
21) The Case of the Drowning Duck 제 3의 공포	1942
22) The Case of the Buried Clock	1943
23) The Case of the Drowsy Mosquito	1943
24) The Case of the Crooked Candle	1944
25) The Case of the Black-Eyed Blonde	1944
26) The Case of the Gold-Diggers Purse	1945
27) The Case of the Half-Wakened Wife	1945
28) The Case of the Borrowed Brunette	1946
29) The Case of the Fan-Dancer's Horse	1947
30) The Case of the Lazy Lover	1947
31) The Case of the Lonely Heiress	1948
32) The Case of the Vagabond Virgin	1948
33) The Case of the Cautious Coquette (Contains also 2 short stories)	1949
34) The Case of the Dubious Bridegroom	1949
35) The Case of the Negligent Nymph	1950
36) The Case of the One-Eyed Witness	1950
37) The Case of the Fiery Fingers	1951
38) The Case of the Angry Mourner	1951
39) The Case of the Grinning Gorilla	1952
40) The Case of the Moth-Eaten Mink	1952
41) The Case of the Green-Eyed Sister	1953
42) The Case of the Hesitant Hostess	1953
43) The Case of the Fugitive Nurse	1954
44) The Case of the Runaway Corpse	1954
45) The Case of the Restless Redhead	1954
46) The Case of the Glamorous Ghost	1955
47) The Case of the Sunbather's Diary	1955
48) The Case of the Nervous Accomplice	1955
49) The Case of the Terrified Typist	1956
50) The Case of the Demure Defendant	1956
51) The Case of the Gilded Lily	1956
52) The Case of the Lucky Loser	1957
53) The Case of the Screaming Woman	1957
54) The Case of the Daring Decoy	1957
55) The Case of the Long-Legged Models	1958
56) The Case of the Calendar Girl	1958
57) The Case of the Foot-Loose Doll	1958
58) The Case of the Deadly Toy	1959
59) The Case of the Mythical Monkeys	1959
60) The Case of the Singing Skirt	1959
61) The Case of the Waylaid Wolf	1960
62) The Case of the Duplicate Daughter	1960
63) The Case of the Shapely Shadow	1960
64) The Case of the Spurious Spinster	1961
65) The Case of the Bigamous Spouse	1961
66) The Case of the Reluctant Model	1962
67) The Case of the Blonde Bonanza	1962
68) The Case of the Ice-Cold Hands	1962
69) The Case of the Amorous Aunt	1963
70) The Case of the Mischievous Doll	1963
71) The Case of the Stepdaughter's Secret	1963
72) The Case of the Daring Divorcee	1964
73) The Case of the Phantom Fortune 환상의 재난	1964
74) The Case of the Horrified Heirs	1964
75) The Case of the Troubled Trustee	1965
76) The Case of the Beautiful Beggar	1965
77) The Case of the Worried Waitress	1966
78) The Case of the Queenly Contestant	1967
79) The Case of the Careless Cupid	1968
80) The Case of the Fabulous Fake	1969
81) The Case of the Fenced-In Woman	1972
82) The Case of the Postponed Murder	1973
Other Novels
1) The D.A. Calls It Murder	1937
2) Murder Up My Sleeve	1937
3) The D.A. Holds a Candle	1938
4) The D.A. Draws a Circle	1939
5) The D.A. Goes to Trial	1940
6) The Case of the Turning Tide	1941
7) The D.A. Cooks a Goose	1942
8) The Case of the Smoking Chimney	1943
9) The D.A. Calls a Turn	1944
10) Over the Hump	1945
11) The D.A. Breaks a Seal	1946
12) The Case of the Backward Mule	1946
13) Two Clues (novelets)	1947
14) The D.A. Takes a Chance	1948
15) The D.A. Breaks an Egg	1949
16) The Case of the Musical Cow	1950
17) The Case of the Murderer's Bride (short stories)	1969
18) The Case of the Crimson Kiss (short stories)	1970
19) The Case of the Crying Swallow (short stories)	1971
20) The Case of the Irate Witness (short stories)	1972
21) The Amazing Adventures of Chester Leith (short stories)	1980
22) The Human Zero (short stories)	1981
23) The Adventures of Paul Pry (short stories)	1990
24) The Blonde in Lower Six (short stories)	1990
25) Dead Man's Letters and other short novels (short stories)	1990
Novels as 'A.A. Fair'
1) The Bigger They Come (UK Title: Lam to the Slaughter)	1939
2) Turn on the Heat	1940
3) Gold Comes in Bricks	1940
4) Spill the Jackpot!	1941
5) Double or Quits	1941
6) Owls Don't Blink	1942
7) Bats Fly at Dusk	1942
8) Cats Prowl at Night	1943
9) Give 'Em the Axe (UK Title: An Axe to Grind)	1944
10) Crows Can't Count	1946
11) Fools Die on Friday	1947
12) Bedrooms Have Windows	1949
13) Top of the Heap	1952
14) Some Women Won't Wait	1953
15) Beware the Curves	1956
16) You Can Die Laughing	1957
17) Some Slips Don't Show	1957
18) The Count of Nine	1958
19) Pass the Gravy	1959
20) Kept Women Can't Quit	1960
21) Bachelors Get Lonely	1961
22) Shills Can't Cash Chips (UK Title: Stop at the Red Light)	1961
23) Try Anything Once	1962
24) Fish or Cut Bait	1963
25) Up for Grabs	1964
26) Cut Thin to Win	1965
27) Widows Wear Weeds	1966
28) Traps Need Fresh Bait	1967
29) All Grass Isn't Green	1970
Novel as 'Carleton Kendrake'
1) The Clew of the Forgotten Murder 잊혀진 살인	1935
Novel as 'Charles J. Kenny'
1) This Is Murder	1935

KEATING’S 100 BEST CRIME AND MYSTERY BOOKS 1987

1845     Edgar Allan Poe                  Tales of Mystery and Imagination 
1868     Wilkie Collins                      The Moonstone 월장석                                               1870     Charles Dickens                  The Mystery of Edwin Drood 에드윈 드루드의 비밀
1892     Arthur Conan Doyle            The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes 셜록 홈즈의 모험
1899     E. W. Hornung                    The Amateur Cracksman 
1902     Arthur Conan Doyle            The Hound of the Baskervilles 바스커빌가의 개
1907     Jacques Futrelle                   The Thinking Machine 사고 기계
1908     Mary Roberts Rinehart        The Circular Staircase 
1911     G. K. Chesterton                 The Innocence of Father Brown 브라운 신부의 동심
1918     Melville Davisson Post         Uncle Abner 엉클 애브너의 지혜 
1925     Edgar Wallace                     The Mind of J. G. Reeder 
1926     Agatha Christie                    The Murder of Roger Ackroyd 애크로이드살인사건
1929     Dashiell Hammett                 Red Harvest 붉은 수확
1929     C. H. B. Kitchin                   Death of My Aunt 
1930     Dorothy L. Sayers                The Documents in the Case 
1930     Dashiell Hammett                 The Maltese Falcon 말타의 매
1931     Arthur W. Upfield                The Sands of Windee 
1932     Francis Iles                           Before the Fact 여자 살인 이야기
1933     Erle Stanley Gardner            The Case of the Sulky Girl 토라진 아가씨
1934     Agatha Christie                    Murder on the Orient Express 오리엔트 특급 살인
1934     James M. Cain                     The Postman Always Rings Twice 우편배달부는 벨을 두번 울린다
1934     Dorothy L. Sayers                The Nine Tailors 나인테일러스
1935     John Dickson Carr               The Hollow Man (The Three Coffins) 세 개의 관
1935     Rex Stout                             The League of Frightened Men 
1936     Ethel Lina White                  The Wheel Spins 
1938     Nicholas Blake                    The Beast Must Die 야수는 죽어야 한다
1940     Cornell Woolrich                 The Bride Wore Black 검은 옷의 신부
1940     Ngaio Marsh                        Surfeit of Lampreys or Death of a Peer 
1942     Ellery Queen                        Calamity Town 재앙의 거리
1942     Cyril Hare                            Tragedy at Law 
1942     Raymond Chandler               The High Window 하이 윈도
1944     Christianna Brand                Green for Danger 
1945     Michael Innes                      Appleby’s End 
1946     Elizabeth Ferrars                  Murder Among Friends 
1946     Helen Eustis                         The Horizontal Man 
1946     Edmund Crispin                   The Moving Toyshop 
1947     Frederick Brown                 The Fabulous Clipjoint 
1948     Josephine Tey                      The Franchise Affair 
1948     John Franklin Bardin             Devil Take the Blue-Tail Fly 
1948     Margery Allingham               More Work for the Undertaker 
1949     Georges Simenon                 My Friend Maigret 
1949     W. R. Burnett                       The Asphalt Jungle 
1950     Michael Gilbert                    Smallbone Deceased 
1950     Georges Simenon                 The Stain on the Snow, The  Snow Was Black. 
1951     Josephine Tey                      The Daughter of Time 시간의 딸
1952     Hillary Waugh                      Last Seen Wearing… 
1952     Margery Allingham               The Tiger in the Smoke 
1953     John Bingham                       Five Roundabouts to Heaven 
1953     Raymond Chandler               The Long Goodbye 기나긴 이별
1953     Guy Cullingford                    Post Mortem 
1954     Shelley Smith                       The Party at No. 5 
1955     Patricia Highsmith                The Talented Mr. Ripley 태양은 가득히
1955     Margaret Millar                    The Beast in View 
1956     John Creasey (J. J. Marric)  Gideon’s Week 
1956     Stanley Ellin                         Mystery Stories 특별 요리
1960     Georges Simenon                 Maigret in Court 
1960     Michael Innes                      The New Sonia Wayward 
1963     Nicholas Freeling                 Gun Before Butter 
1963     Dorothy Hughes                   The Expendable Man 
1964     Jim Thompson                      Pop. 1280 
1966     E. B. Eberhart                      R. S. V. P. Murder 
1967     Julian Symons                      The Man Who Killed Himself 
1967     Emma Lathen                       Murder Against the Grain 
1967     Maj Sjowall, Per Wahloo     Roseanna 
1967     George Sims                         The Last Best Friend 
1968     Peter Dickinson                    The Glass-Sided Ants’ Nest 
1968     Helen McCloy                      Mr. Splitfoot 
1969     Patricia Highsmith                The Tremor of Forgery 
1969     Chester Himes                      Blind Man With a Pistol 
1970     Joan Fleming                        Young Man, I Think You're Dying 
1970     Margaret Millar                    Beyond This Point are Monsters 
1972     Ed McBain                           Sadie When She Died 
1972     George V. Higgins               The Friends of Eddie Coyle 
1972     Julian Symons                      The Players and the Game 
1972     Stanley Ellin                        Mirror, Mirror on the Wall 
1973     Tony Hillerman                    Dance Hall of the Dead 
1974     Peter Dickinson                   The Poison Oracle 
1974     Gregory McDonald             Fletch 플레치
1975     P. D. James                         The Black Tower 검은 탑
1975     Celia Fremlin                       The Long Shadow 
1975     Colin Watson                      The Naked Nuns or Six Nuns and a Shotgun. 
1976     Ross Macdonald                 The Blue Hammer 
1976     Agatha Christie                   Sleeping Murder 잠자는 살인
1976     Dorothy Salisbury Davis      A Death in the Life 
1976     Dorothy Uhnak                   The Investigation 
1977     Ruth Rendell                       A Judgement in Stone 유니스의 비밀
1977     William McIlvanney             Laidlaw 
1977     Donald Westlake                Nobody's Perfect 
1978     Reginald Hill                       A Pinch of Snuff 
1979     Joseph Hansen                    Skinflick 
1979     P. M. Hubbard                    Kill Claudio 
1979     John D. MacDonald            The Green Ripper 
1981     John Wainwright                  All On a Summer's Day 
1981     Amanda Cross                    Death in a Tenured Position 
1981     Joseph Wambaugh              The Glitter Dome 
1982     June Thomson                     To Make a Killing 
1982     Peter Lovesey                     The False Inspector Dew 가짜 경감 듀
1984     James McClure                   The Artful Egg 
1986     P. D. James                         A Taste for Death 죽음의 맛

FEMINISTA'S 100 GREAT 20TH CENTURY WORKS OF FICTION BY WOMEN

Allison, Dorothy	Bastard Out of Carolina
Angelou, Maya	I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings
Atwood, Margaret	Cat's Eye
Bainbridge, Beryl	The Bottle Factory Outing
Bambara, Toni Cade	Gorilla, My Love
Barnes, Djuna	Nightwood
Barker, Pat	Regeneration
Brookner, Anita	Hotel du Lac
Brown, Rita	Rubyfruit Jungle
Buck, Pearl S.	The Good Earth 대지
Byatt, A. S.	Possession
Carter, Angela	Nights at the Circus
Chopin, Kate	The Awakening
Cisneros, Sandra	The House on Mango Street
Compton-Burnett, Ivy	Elders and Betters
Desai, Anita	Clear Light of Day
Dinesen, Isak	Out of Africa
Doerr, Harriet	Stones for Ibarra
Drabble, Margaret	The Radiant Way
DuMaurier, Daphne	Rebecca 레베카
Emecheta, Buchi	Second Class Citizen
Erdich, Louise	Tracks
Fitzgerald, Penelope	At Freddie's
Flagg, Fannie	Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Cafe
Frame, Janet	Owls Do Cry
French, Marilyn	The Women's Room
Goldstein, Rebecca	The Mind-Body Problem
Gordimer, Nadine	July's People
Gordon, Mary	The Rest of Life
Hall, Radclyffe	The Well of Loneliness
Head, Bessie	When Rain Clouds Gather
Highsmith, Patricia	The Talented Mr. Ripley 태양은 가득히
Hobhouse, Janet	The Furies
Hulme, Keri	The Bone People
Hurston, Zora Neale	Their Eyes Were Watching God
Jackson, Shirley	The Haunting of Hill House
Jhabvala, Ruth Prawer	Heat and Dust
Jong, Erica	Fear of Flying
Kincaid, Jamaica	Lucy
Kingsolver, Barbara	The Bean Trees
Kingston, Maxine Hong	Tripmaster Monkey
Kogawa, Joy	Obasan
Laurence, Margaret	The Fire-Dwellers
Lee, Harper	To Kill a Mockingbird 앵무새 죽이기
Lessing, Doris	The Golden Notebook
Lively, Penelope	Moon Tiger
Loos, Anita	Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
Manning, Olivia	The Balkan Trilogy
McCarthy, Mary	The Group
McCullers, Carson	Ballad of the Sad Cafe
McMillan, Terry	Mama
Miller, Isabel	Patience and Sarah
Mitchell, Margaret	Gone With the Wind 바람과 함께 사라지다
Moore, Lorrie	Anagrams
Morrison, Toni	Beloved
Mukherjee, Bharati	Wife
Munro, Alice	Lives of Girls and Women
Murdoch, Iris	A Severed Head
Oates, Joyce Carol	You Must Remember This
O'Brien, Edna	House of Splendid Isolation
O'Connor, Flannery	A Good Man Is Hard to Find
Olsen, Tillie	Tell Me a Riddle
Paley, Grace	Enormous Changes at the Last Minute
Parker, Dorothy	Stories
Phillips, Jayne Anne	Black Tickets
Piercy, Marge	Braided Lives
Plath, Sylvia	The Bell Jar
Porter, Katharine Anne	Ship of Fools
Powell, Dawn	The Golden Spur
Proulx, E. Annie	The Shipping News
Rand, Ayn	The Fountainhead
Renault, Mary	The King Must Die
Rhys, Jean	Wide Sargasso Sea
Robinson, Marilynne	Housekeeping
Roy, Arundhati	The God of Small Things
Sarton, May	Mrs. Stevens Hears the Mermaids Singing
Shields, Carol	The Stone Diaries
Shreve, Anita	The Weight of Water
Silko, Leslie Marmon	Almanac of the Dead
Simpson, Mona	Anywhere But Here
Smart, Elizabeth	By Grand Central Station I Sat Down and Wept
Smiley, Jane	The Age of Grief
Sontag, Susan	The Volcano Lover
Spark, Muriel	The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie
Stead, Christina	The Man Who Loved Children
Stein, Gertrude	Three Lives
Tan, Amy	The Joy Luck Club
Taylor, Elizabeth	Angel
Tyler, Anne	If Morning Ever Comes
Urquart, Jane	Away
Walker, Alice	The Color Purple
Weldon, Fay	The Life and Loves of a She-Devil
Welty, Eudora	Stories
West, Rebecca	The Return of the Soldier
Wharton, Edith	Ethan Frome
White, Antonia	Frost in May
Winterson, Jeanette	Oranges Are Not the Only Fruit
Woolf, Virginia	Mrs. Dalloway

딱히 추리 소설 리스트는 아니지만 패트리셔 하이스미스의 <태양은 가득히>가 눈에 띄어서...

영국추리작가협회상 - 존 크리시상

2008 The Bethlehem Murders Matt Benyon Rees
2007 Broken things Gillian Flynn
2006 Still Life Louise Penny
2005 Running Hot Dreda Say Mitchell
2004 Amagansett Mark Mills
2003 Mission Flats William Landay
2002 The Cutting Room Louise Welsh
2001 The Earthquake bird Susanna Jones
2000 God is a bullet Boston Teran
1999 Lie in the dark Dan Fesperman
1998Garnethill Denise Mina
1997 Body Politic Paul Johnston
1996 No award
1995 One for the money Janet Evanovich
1994 Big town Doug J Swanson
1993 No award
1992 The Ice house Minette Walters
1991 Deep sleep Frances Fyfield
1990 Postmortem Patricia Daniels Cornwell
1989 A Real shot in the arm Annette Roome
1988 Death’s bright angel Janet Neel 검은 사도
1987 Dark apostle Denis Kilcommons
1986 Tinplate Neville Steed
1985 The Latimer mercy Robert Richards
1984 A Very private enterprise Elizabeth Ironside
1983 The Ariadne clue Carol Clemeau
1983 The Night the gods smiled Eric Wright
1982 Caroline miniscule Andrew Taylor
1981 The Ludi victor James Leigh
1980 Dupe Liza Cody
1979 David Serafin Saturday of Glory
1978 Paula Gosling A Running Duck  페어 게임
1977 Jonathan Gash The Judas Pair
1976 Patrick Alexander Death of a Thin-Skinned Animal
1975 Sara George Acid Drop
1974 Roger Simon The Big Fix
1973 Kyril Bonfiglioli Don't Point That Thing at Me